He or she: What will babes be?

“Do you know what you’re having?”

Hands down, this is always the second question people ask me after I tell them I am pregnant. People, and not just those in my life, seem to be obsessed with finding out their baby’s gender. When I first got pregnant, I read so many blog posts and online articles about how early you can find out and how some mamas-to-be even decide to do first-trimester genetic tests just to find out the sex of their baby earlier than the standard 20-week anatomical ultrasound. I think I read recently that somewhere around 85% of mamas-to-be find out the baby’s gender now. While I can certainly appreciate the desire to want to know, I hate to break it to all of you, but hubby and I are opting for the full-blown surprise on this one.

Why did we decide to not find out our baby’s gender? A few reasons.

Shock Value

Before we were even pregnant, Jeremy and I talked about this. I actually was always on Team Find Out, but he wasn’t. When I asked him why, his reason not only melted my heart, but it also made me do a complete 180 in my thinking. He said that as adults, there are very few true surprises left in life and having your baby’s gender revealed at birth really is the ultimate surprise.

I mean, really, how sweet is that?

Both or Neither

While I agreed with Jeremy, I also knew we had to be on the same page with the decision because there was no way I would be able to find out and then have to keep it a secret from him. As I have declared before, I am a horrible secret-keeper. So one of us knowing was just not going to be an option.

Fashion Crisis

Another thing that has become more clear to me now is that knowing or not knowing isn’t really changing how we prepare for baby’s arrival. Honestly, if anything, it’s saving us some money in not being able to go out buy a ton of adorable outfits (yet!). But, I am not a girly girl, so if babes happens to be a girl, I don’t foresee myself dressing her in pink ribbons, bows, and tutus. In fact, I actually prefer neutrals anyway so any clothing bought-to-date has fallen in the grey, blue, white, and yellow color palettes. While it might make it a tad difficult for friends and family members to buy cutesy outfits for when babes grows, I am okay with that. I find shopping in both the girls and boys sections yields some amazing finds. Who knew I was so progressive?

Nursery Decor

If you saw the sneak peek preview of our nursery in a few of my latest Instagram posts, you will also notice it’s very gender neutral. The walls are a teal blue and all of the furniture and accents are white. Personally, I find this palette very calming and soothing and it would have been my preference, even if I knew the gender.


When it comes to naming, I think it’s just as easy to have ideas for both a boy and a girl. This was another thing Jeremy and I talked about before we were pregnant, so we’ve been pretty set on our names since the very beginning.

Doesn’t all of this just seem a lot less stressful than people make it out to be?

Whether you agree with our logic or not, the truth of the matter is that in 23 weeks (plus a few days), my husband and I will get the surprise of our lives and I cannot wait for that moment.

Did you find out your baby’s gender? What was your reasoning for doing so or not? I would love to hear your stories so please feel free to share them with me.


3 thoughts on “He or she: What will babes be?

  1. Michelle says:

    Good for you guys sticking with your choice to make it a surprise. There is so much pressure from everyone to know…strangers are to worse.

    We decided to find out as I am a controll freak and have to plan everything…or at least mentally prepare. My husband also would not discuss names until we knew the sex….he spent two months reading four different name books to come up with a list for one gender. We did have a gender reveal parry with our families to find out. This was alot of fun and allowed us to share the suprise moment with our families as I already knew I only wanted my hubby at the hospital for the birth and the 1st bit of recovery.


    • bunintheevans says:

      Hi Michelle. Thanks for your sharing your experience. It sounds like finding out was definitely the right decision for you and your hubby. What did you end up having? A girl or boy? I cannot wait for the surprise at the end. It’s going to be so fun! Thanks so much for reading.
      All the best,


  2. Patti says:

    When I was pregnant with Matty I didn’t want to know. When I was pregnant with the girls we found out. I didn’t want to know with my third daughter but he dad did. Figuring that Robyn was going to be my last I wanted not to know what it was like not knowing until the end. So when I got pregnant with my fourth I made it known I didn’t want to know. It was a great surprise after nine months of being pregnant and hours of labor to have that surprise at the end was a great thing. I agree with your husband life has very few surprises when you are an adult so when a chance to have one of the best surprises comes along take it.
    But always remember this is your and your husband decision.


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